HEY THERE!..

..okie i m back in blogging..but this gonna be my last post and i will no longer blog.

i wanna be simple.
i wanna my life to be simple
soo...
best is only my girls.
schlmate
and someone
know whats i m going through each day..
i don wan others to know and interfer my life

for who is she..
pls..i know u tell him alot of things.
yes..condemn me for all u wan..
blame me..
for writing a blog.
for letting u interfer my life.
for letting u affect my mood
if u think that i m once wit a bad guy which makes u sees me as a bad girl
go ahead
its okie..
i m used to be affected by u..
bt from todae onwards
my world my time
will revolved wit my girls.. classmate..and *someone..
bt till todae i donnoe wad i do wrong to deserve u condemning me
cox i m wit a bad guy?
so i m a bad girl?
is it fair?
i know u don like me hanging arund wit e riders..
i know u don like me to be in good terms wit them
okie..
i shall not..
i shall stay real far away..

okie enough of swearing ppl
..

i'm in a real confuse state right now..
i'm feeling real terrible.
i am no longer wit him
cox i don love myself.
i hate myself.
how have i e right to love someone.
though sometime i really feel i love him
bt once again.
i feel i don't have e right.

i dreamt i hugged him damn tight.
i'm confuse wit my mind and heart.
one always sae listen to your heart.
is it true?
bt things always don turn out good when i listen to my heart
im afraid..terrified..
for once i shall listen to my brain
i gonna be friends wit him for e time being
though its difficult.. i will try
though i wanna hug him
i won..
i shall stay a distance as a friend..

i'm sorrie for those ppl around me.
my girls,classmate..sorry
i will be fine.
bt for the time being.pls forgive me for being quiet
and at times i won be laughing like i do
bt i will try to laugh.to give u a smile though i m sad
k?
love!

oh god.i feeling very sad..i feel like crying!.
no!!

i gonna do a damn stupid thing!
i gonna write a letter to my grandma.
and burn it to her.
i m really devastated...i m desperate...
no one can help me.
so i shall see if she can?

stupid!.foolish!.
bt i still wanna try!.

okie.this is my last post..i shall post my past and current pic..
and the things dat made my day!
which is my girls!.
we are from strangers to hi-bye friends..to close friends to best friend..den to best friend forever...nw les?
hahaha!.
hmm..bt i really do love them
it sound mushy..
bt i really do mean it..
i love them for giving me e strength..motivation.
thanks!..
i appreciate u girls
i do.
=)
cheers!.
i'm thankful cox u all know me e best!.
don forget our drinking session up alritE!

can't wait for dat dae!!

okie i got pissed when uploading pics..
i shall do it another day..alrite..
dat pics will be my last post...
bye..for e time being

hey hey

oh god..

its reali been a long time
i start blogging and
getting myslef sitting infront of e comp

hmm..update a few stuff..
on fri nite i went drinking wit my classmate..
some went hme early..
onli fish and meifen was intending to spent our nite at clark quay
when the clock gonna hit 11..meifen went hme first
onli left wit me and fish..
we were like roaming abt to find pubs wit nice music.best wit dance floor
haha..
den later my guy tag along..
we went to one nite stand..
its better den cheekys can!!
my lovely girls..next time i rather go der eh
its not like filled wit indians songs onli and stuff

haha..suddenly i tot of e guy at e dance floor..
oh my god!!!..if u see this guy
pls rate him 5 stars!!
hahahaha!
damn funnie guy..
his dance step is like onli using his hand can
and the worst thing is like he praying to something

oh my god!!!!!
hahahahahha!

funnie funnie!

mani things have happen
mani unexpected things have happen too

the girl on my tag board..
pls don go round distract ppl life
..if u really wanna do something for evan
and reali care for her and wants her to be happy
stay far away...
bt if u reali insist on wad u sae is e truth...
den u shuld jus sae hu u r
..and not hiding your identity
..cox it will onli make u like someone
who is spoiling others relationship nw!..
get it and understand girl?

im blessed to have my girls who is always der..
my guy who always tried his best to make my dae.
my classmate who goes crazy wit me when i m tired
haha.
see how blessed can i be..:)

this are ppl who i really thank god dat i met dem

sometime i met those who reali create disaster to my life..
bt thanks man..
those guys..
because u create disaster in my life.
e more i feel disgusted by u guys
and would reali reali stay far far away from u all
..and it makes me happier
to stay a distance from this kind of trash..

my guy..his someone who is sweet and cute at times..
he did things to make my day a happier dae
though sometime i m reali down and sad
he does make my day!!
he buys me bread when i m hungry..
he brings me hme when its late..
he tried to make me smile by making me angry..haha
he listens to my sorrows.
he buy me sweets when he knows i feel uncomfortable in qutting
he give stupid and e most lousiest excuse to do things for me
which reali makes my day.:)
he did e heart shape and bel by using coins
he brings me to watch stars which is dat beautiful
he is someone dat i misses ..
he is someone who i begining to trust or had already placed my trust on
bt pls don break tis trust.
i happy to know this guy :)
thanks for trying to make my day!!


okie i have tons and tons left undone..i shuld start doing..
before its all too late
okie okie
i shall update another time..when i m free again?!..
hahaha..

i missed my girls!!
love dem!!!
i want a meet up!!!:):)

Labels: rather be hated for what I am, than loved for what I pretend to be.

Elow!

its been quite long i nv been blogging..
im tempted to blog again..

hmm..

where shuld i start frm?

okie dat dey i recieve a msg frm yew ting(evan)
telling me dat nick still like me and stuff

i tink through wad she sae to me
i finally gt e ans to all my questions
hais..
i don like him animore
and its true
its just memories
and its true
i don hate this guy animore..
cox i having neutral feelings for him
yeap

so i make my stand clear now..i don like him animore..
so wadever it is..he will not affect my mood and i won't be back wit him

yeap

now i have another thing in mind..
yew ting(evan) dat time lied to keeble dat i have someone in mind
shit..
things seem to turn out this wae
i m like having someone in mind..

shit..
it shuld not turn out this way
i shuld not be having someone in mind..
i m crazy..
im afraid of getting hurt
and y i still having someone in my mind!..
i m full of craps.

shit shit shit..

hais
i m so confuse now..
reali confuse.
shuld i stop myself..
from falling for it again
maybe it will turn out e same again
or maybe..
hiya..

bleh!
i m crazy!!!..
shall keep e rest of my feelings to myself..den...
chill

i m like mugging nowadays..
bt things doesn't get into my brains..

wadever...
schls!.
wadever!
so boring!!


i wan back my happening lifes.!!
haha!..




jian hui u r best!:)
do well for tml test!!..its nv late!!..so faster go master those chapters now !!!
and stop singing..go concentrate!!...!.. u still owe me siew mai..:)

smile!:)


my dearest lovely cia...darling evan....and baby wulan..my important person ms...do well for your exams...alrite!!..meet up soon!!..love u girls!!!:)...my lg!!...lets meet up again..for zhi cha!..or steamboat!!!!..love u !!..muackz!!!

Labels: i'm in foul mood

its been days i last blog

i was out enjoying life..
i have to la..
cox my schl is starting real soon!

oh goD!!

hmm..
nw alot thoughts went through my mind actually
i cannot stop thinking..

yst went out wit wx sj and sj friend..
go watch movie and play funfair..
hmm..its getting more and more no kick.
i wanted to used dat as my sound proof wall..
haha..i feel like shouting out loud!
bt no kick
how to shout
haha.
den we catch e movie NEXT
its nice..credits goes to sj (lg)

hmm..den later sj had to go hme
cox she having work e next day
so i went out wit wx..
i don feel like going hme..cox if im at hme..
i will be thinking things which i shuld not think
so went places
and later dey wanted to go hme..and i m still not in e mood to go hme..
den i went to meet riders.
half wae

calls from evan(yt)
keeble wants to meet her..
i m worried for safety so i tag along
den me wx..evan was on e cab to his house.
cox he was drunk
and wanted evan to be by his side

wtf..i saw nick der..
i was like shock to e max
and was feeling damn sad.
i donnoe y

i m seriously telling him..don tell me u love and misses and stuff
when u don mean it..
cox it will be hard on me..
can he don do this to me..
if u want find other girls..
i m more den glad to hear dat.
and not lying to me..dat u nid me..
or wadever when its all a lie
yes it easy for u to sae dat
bt hard for me to listen it !

hmm..not reali in a mood now..

evan(yt)..wadever it is..come to me if u nie help alrite..love love!

wx-thanks!.:)

Labels: i'm in foul mood

updating..
in process

i went to nan yang poly to find my girls..
i was worried..
i hope she will be fine soon..
den headed to chinatown..
and later to woodlands to play e uk funfair..
oh god!..its fun la!*
u can reali forget wads your name up der!*
haha!*
i love my girls!*..
i do..
cia-recover soon*..:)
evan-u recover soon too!*..:)
..i will be der..when u nid someone..

* love love


i feeling so emo now..

y y y ?

i remember me and him said before we exchange our hearts..
and if i m without him or his heart i will die..
am i dying?..

smetime i feel like i m dying
i know ppl out der keep telling me..
hiya don bt sad or emo for this guy
his just someone not worth doing so

i know..i know.
bt maybe i m stupid dump or being a retard..
missing this guy..
feeling sad by this guy
i sae i shuld not be affected by him
i m trying hard
i view his friendster and
saw his main pic caption as
"TRUST ME >>i will never come back to u.."
hmm..
y does it hurts when i see this..
i m reali sad in knowing his true colours after tat break up
wit him i reali din know..
dat he lie to me dat much..

hmm..

he is just someone who hurt me dat much..
and i shuld had forget abt him long ago..
he even come into ppl relationship
his someone who i disrespect..
i mean if i hear from ppl this guy i wil like wad e fuck!*..

bt now i culd not do so..
i donnoe y i don hate him animore..
what i shuld do!*

m i crazy?*

hello*

pls..

save me*

he hurt me..
he hurt my friend
he lied.
we are not suitable
his being childish

forget him!

if i have e courage to
love him from e start where i already
know he used to be a player of 6 girls..
i shuld have dat courage to let him go.!!**..

yea i keep telling myself..
this is not e first time i m hurt in a relationship
chill and i will be fine
but it seem hard too

wadever!*.

soon this guy will be forgotten..

Labels: i love my girlfriends

lots of things happen..
yst around 12 plus..i went out..to have a car ride..
wit weixiang..haha..
cox i got nothing better to do..

todae hang out wit justin...soo long nv see dat study friend of mine
haha..
watch movie
200 pounds..somthing
cox we had no idea wad to watch
so watch dat..
bt it turns out quite nice..
and touching actually
awww!..

okie..i m here to vent my fucking anger again!!!
damn angry can!!

on the 11 may
he sms me this
: hey baby how you doing? sorry i can't come out anymore lol.i don't have much cash with me and my bank card is with my mother.lol.

i reply him
:u sms wrong ppl

he replied
:oops.sorrie.lol (i knew he sms other ppl..pls la who cares abt u!!)

den i nv reply..
den he reply me
:lol.i don't wan act liao la? tht was just a fake msg to see how u felt abt me now yeah

den i reply
:wadever!..don lie..aniwae it does not bothers me..so wadever

den he reply
:okie lor.means u can get over me liao rite?haiya.i m just in bad luck la?yeah.sorry for disturbing u again..really sorrie (wad!..trying to act innocent again..come on la..!..fuck u bastard!)

den i reply him
:yea i can!..and good luck to all your nonsense..bye forever

wad e fuck!..stop acting like u wanna test me..just admitt if u sent wrong ppl la..
wadever!..u tink u can affect my mood!..no wae..u are just a stranger..i don even know who e fuck u r..why u would affect my mood..come on la!

den todae evan(yewting) ring me..and tell me abt keeble told her dat nick tell her dat i tell nick dat yew ting like someone from her poly
wad e fuck!..
u damn asshole..u trying to break their relationship
come on la..u tink u r clever..
tell u bastard..we are more clever..we knew u would do dat..and we are prepared for it k!..
so u r e fool now!!..
u like to fool ppl rite!!..now look into e mirror and laugh at yourself..
cox u are e no. 1 fool now!!.
fuck u ..congrats u realli pissed me off this time
i don care if u hurt me in e past..bt u try to hurt me friend..
u shuld know..dey are more impt den myself..
so fuck u!!
u r reali a totally low class bastard and a kid!..with your fucking childish mindset u god!..mother fucker!

den i called him and SCOLDED him..and he still fucking deny
wah he reali tink dat we are a kid or wad..
pls la...we know truth..
den he scolded me in e phone saeing..stop all your bullshit!..wad e fuck!!..who e hell are u to sae dat!!..

den i sms him..cox i don wan waste my phone bill in calling him..
so i sms him
:u fucking asshole!..u can lie to e whole world u don ever try to lie to me..i m not a three year old kid like u!..your friends sae u sae u still wanna deny...wad e fuck..u try to break dem up rite!..it gonna be a no way!..damn u..u are e one who make ppl hate u even fucking more!..don go disturb ppl..u are still a kid take care of yourself first.

den he reply
:i know myself okay?just fuck off okay?i know i never tell him anything
(wah okay still question mark!..dumb la..u yourself suspect yourself too!..haha!)

den i reply him
:ya..u knw yourself ..my ass...i feel sad for u..u are always in your lying world..and can nv get out of it...cox u will use another lie to cover up your old lies...so u trying to sae your friends lied?...sure i will fuck off from your world after u fucking fuck off from their world

den he replied:
trust me this time that i nv tell him okay? but when u like accuse me that when i din den its painful k.(wad e hell!..don try to use this trick..i m not into it!)

den i replied him
:yea rite..painful..u go spoil others relationship not painful...u think this world will stop for u...pls la..stop all your fucking lies now!..

den he replied
:cox wad u are thinking is not true k?.if u don believe me then u shuld just stop toking to me..

den i replied
:im not talking!...i fucking scolding u!..u stop all your bullshit rite now..don worri i will not hate u ...cox u are just a fucking stranger!

den he replied
:keeble told me dat he was just playing wit her la..lol.can u pls don anihow tink..i don disturb others relationship k? (pls la..still have e cheeck to lol!..bloody fucker!)

den i replied
:fuck la..i know all e truth..u no nid say so much..fuck off!

den he replied
:wads wrong wit u.don believe go ask him yourself k? (always dare to act so confident..pls la..e whole fucking world knows u r lying..isn't it better for ya to stop denying!...)

den i replied
:i ask him already la ass...of cox i ask him den scold u rite..don find ani fucking trouble for ani of them...just stay in your fucking own world wit your studies!

den he replied
:yeah.and u fuck out of my life k?.i don nid someone like u ..(this sentence went through my heart...it hurts damn lot..bt i won let u affect me animore..cox i don wan a bastard to affect my mood!..)

den i replied
:fuck u la!..who nie u!..i don nie a liar in my life too!..i m fucking talking abt dem and not abt us...u are not e onli guy left...u can just fuck off! (i was damn hurt by his word..and wadever!..aniwae..he gonna be fucking off my world!...)

dats all

can u believe his friendster shoutout is i m not a bad guy bt in a bad luck!!
hahahaha!...ya rite!!..pls la..u go ask around..your friends..my friends...who likes u!!..
i once blinded..nv gonna be!!..
so u r out!!!

fucking ass!..

okie..
its time for me to start blogging
vent my angers here
and my unhappiness!

hmm..many things had happen for e past few weeks after i stop blogging
actually
i stop blogging
cox i don't even have e chance to
work.
find him
where got chance?

bt nw..onli work..and of cox meet up wit my girls

i broke up wit him and its over.
over!!..u get it!

hm..actually i wanted to break up cox i find dat
we are totally not suitable

bt he did something dat made me hate him
he know it best!.

okie nw..i donnoe y talking abt him my tears are like rolling down
i won wan to cry for a person who takes revenge
this relationship means nthing

u are just being too unpredictable
telling me u love me..
and yet writing another thing as your shout out
saying dat get outta of my true love world
wadever!

shut up!

u don even know wads love k!
damn asshole!

thanks for my girls and guys frene out der..
u all made my day
thanks for those concern
i appreciate....i mean it..alot!!
u all rox!
love love!

i promise u all not to shed a tears..
bt i did..and i won animore..
give me some time..i will get over it
and reali over it
cox i know he doesn worth it

trying to get attention from girls..
pls la
wadever!
u can go tell dem wadever u wan

u can now change ur girls like changing clothes..
go ahead..no one stopping u
and stop acting like u care..
when u already don k!

and fcuking stop denying all e facts!
u damn gd liar!.
i m serious..damn gd!

now i have to let e time to heal my wounds.
once again..i will stand up strong on my own.
cox i fall on my own

alicia ask me this question..will i like cry or miss him whn i m alone
e ans i told her is no!
cox even i m alone his no where.
so..
whats der more to miss a person..who is not der all e while

okie..
end of updating my feelings

work work work!
oh god!..
i m dead tired !

i nid to catch some breathe before entering schl!
i wanna relac!
chill..
lepak!
everthing..
shopping
!!!

bt i could not leave dat shop
cox boss don allow me to
cox she is in need for man power
dats e reason y can't leave

i m home alone todae..
as my parents went to genting
hmm..bt i feel weird actually
ahahsx..
alrite..update till here cox kinda tired already..
hands are aching too